Life

I just entered blog into that "how much is you blog worth?" thing and it came up with... "Your blog is worth 0.00 dollars! Good job, your on your way up!"... ... ... 0.00 dollars. Wow... Anyway, on to my post. My days at school have slightly changed since earlier in the year, so here is how they usually go...

1. I arrive at school 20 minutes early.
2. Some kid call me "grandpa" and the teachers try to escort me to the home.
3. I go to the daily "hip moms" meeting.
4. I find out that I am not a hip mom, (I always forget.)
5. I arrive at school just in time for... lunch.
6. People call me "lunch lady boy" while throwing small animals at me.
7. I pull squirrels out of various uncomfortable places... like... my nose...
8. I am rushed to the hospital where the doctor says,"congratulations young lady, your pregnant!"
9. Uh oh.

Yeah, so that's how my days are going. Once again, if you want to advertise for free on this blog, just email me here!

Senior Citizen Appreciation Day... Again?

Apparently the seniors bus broke down and they had to stay at the school over night. So the teachers decided to just take the day off while the seniors did the classes. In my first class the guy talked to us about how he remembered history...

Abe Linkoln... what a man. Oh I remember when we started colonizing this here country. Har har har har, back when I was 70. The fun me and Benny Franklin used to have... Playing with those kites... and plastic explosives... Those were the days...

Yeah, then when I was supposed to be having math, some guy talked about speaking Spanish. Eventually when somebody informed him that we were in math class he just said, "well duhhhhhhhh!" Then he kept on saying that, "duhhhhhhhhh duhhhhhhhhhhhhhh duhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"
That was one of the best classes of my life. Hopefully they will find a way to get the seniors home. Until then, see ya!

Senior Citizen Appreciation Day

Today was Senior Citizen Appreciation Day at school. They had some old people come in and give us speeches. Then they matched us up with a senior and let us socialize for about an hour. The guy I got paired up with was pretty cool... except he kept on telling this story over and over again with slightly different details. I'll go ahead and write down my favorite version. Here it is,

So there I was, on top of Mount Saint Helens, Battling the army of zombie warlords. The lava was everywhere. I pulled out the ol' electric guitar and started jamming. Me and Jimmy Hendrix were all over the place. That was when George Washington showed up. He pulled out his guitar and we destroyed the enemy army with our sweet riffs! That was how I got this scar on my nose! When I get mad it sorta looks like...

We don't need to go any further... Anyway, I didn't really want to tell the guy that the teachers had told me that he was really a crazy old man so I didn't. After school it was fun. Some kids grandpa was telling all of his embarassing storys in the audotorium. Ha ha, after that I'll be suprised if he comes back to school!

Just Another One

Hi, I'm back with another post. I can't wait until Fredward gets back from his vacation. Nobody else even talks to me... not my friends... or my teachers... or my parents... Anyway, school was pretty normal today. I arrive at school. I get hit by some kind of projectile (pencil, cat, teacher, ice cream truck.) I go to my first class. I go to my second class. My teacher locks me out of my third class. I climb the side of the building and go in through the windows. I get in trouble for not using the door like normal people. I go to my fourth class. I go to my fifth class. I get mistaken for a sixth grader and put on some kind of field trip or something. I get back just after lunch. And for the rest of the day I listen to people pronounce me name wrong... B-I-L-ogna... B-I-ke... Agatha. Anyway on my way home from school I got a phone call. Can you believe it. I guess paying for 7 months of service was well worth it. And now I know that my phone sort of works. Anyway I picked up and immediatley heard, "HELLO YOUNG LADY. THIS IS NOT A COMMERCIAL CALL. YOU COULD BE GETTING LOWER CREDIT RATES. THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE TO PURCHASE LOWER CREDIT RATES. YOU WILL ONLY HAVE TO PAY THE PRICE THAT WE ARE CHARGING FOR LOWER CREDIT RATES. I AM VERY PLEASED THAT YOUR MOTHER IS..."
Then the call cut off and it was silence. That was the first call i've ever gotten. OH YEAH!